Sunday, June 15, 2008


1. I remember heroes in black and white, from a time in black and white. My grandfather's war, the second World War, was in black & white. There were not as many questions. Morals were simpler, people had simpler choices and it seems to me were more straightforward.
He'd always go back to those three years of fighting, as the most important of his life. Of course, whenever I asked him about it, my grandmother would go "oh, here we go agaaaaaain".

2. Time has taken her away. She was travelling last time I was in France, and I couldn't meet her. She died suddenly, while I'm here, away.

We always assume that we have time, when we really don't. We can't afford to postpone anything: seeing family, friends, our loved ones, when we are able to see them, because really no one knows what can happen next. It's very obvious, of course, but still we forget about it all the time: WE DON'T HAVE TIME. We forget until it's too late.

When life goes away, so go the laughters to come, and the ones you had are all that's left.

3. Se worried about me since you left. She asked questions.

I saw a recent picture of you, by coincidence, on the net. It was unexpected. And it did me good: I felt nothing. It made me realize I am probably not in love with you any more. There is just this longing of something valuable that was wasted away. Like I gave a part of me that is gone, and there's a hollow feeling there.

I still google your name sometimes, to check on you. All I need is to know that you're alright, that you're doing fine. The only form of love I have left for you: knowing that you're ok. And that is enough.

4. There's more life and love ahead, but it's hard to jump into the water again when you nearly drowned once. This week, I had a very real reminder that time is running from our fingers.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

it will go on